31 July 2011

Last post before returning to Goslar

So... this is it. Summer holidays are almost over. Tomorrow we'll be driving back to Goslar. Some days ago I was looking forward to it. Tonight, not really.
But as my sister would tell me: happy thoughts, happy thoughts....

Sadly, though, Micha received news that one of his classmates had recently taken her own life and upon hearing this he has been since then in deep melancholy.
"She was nice, funny, likeable, and pretty..." he says. "No one would think that such a thing could even happen. That's just too bad." It's going to be his contemplation and moment of silence for a little while.

This was strange because last night I had a dream of him talking to me about a certain girl he used to know. I don't remember details but his body language in my dream was exactly the way it is at this moment... sullen but okay. And then suddenly he went on a rampage... the scenery changed and we were in a huge warehouse with bright lights and light items wrapped in industrial plastic stored on tall, huge shelves. He took them all down with his bare hands as if in a hurry - as if trying to find something he never will. I stood and watched. A little afraid but at the same time intrigued. What could it be? I asked myself.
Well now I know.

So tragic. So sad. But I don't know the girl.
Come to think of it, I haven't heard news from much of my classmates or what they're doing. Or if they're all still alive. I bet they are though, since most of them are muslims and if they even think about suicide then they'll end up in hell, so... I bet they're all still out there somewhere. I've heard just news of a few getting married and making babies or already having babies. Well, I'm not having babies. I'm too afraid I would accidentally drop them or forget about them.

*sigh*... I will hop onto the sad boat too... because my feet have been cold for more than 24 hours (with socks on), my breasts hurt, I'm hungry, and I didn't get to meet my ex-classmate who's living here in Göttingen. I can pretty much guess that I won't meet him in a long, long time.

Being here made me forget some important things, so it is time tonight to pull myself together and not resist what is. During my stay here I've also drafted some paintings that I cannot wait to start working on. I learned a bunch of new ideas for my art studio and I've been too caught up in it that I have yet to do my revision. I look forward to so suck in school. But what the hell.

So every beginning has an end.
The naked, solid truth.
Like the bodies we are in.
And my blog post for today.

I shall catch up with you lot again as soon as I can.
Thanks for your company thus far. Have a fantastic week!


  1. So summer's over so soon. Felt like it had just started, though there's no summer here where I am.

    Sorry to hear about Michael's classmate. It reminds me of the time I spoke about my dead ex-colleague a few years back, also a suicide. I remember how shocked I was. And like his classmate, she was also nice, funny, likeable and pretty. I can only hope the both of them are in a better place now. Your man will be fine, he's a tough man, right?

    Good luck with your revision and your art studio. I look forward to hearing more about the latter soon. Thanks for commenting on my Fargo post, and I don't know if you do, but do come to the other blog I have. Anything you can contribute to its quality, I wanna hear it.

    Take care Ira, God speed.

  2. Isn't it summer? How come it's cold enough to get your whole body cold, unless you're sick...

  3. I'm really sorry to hear about Mike's classmate too. Suicide is something horrible.

    At the same time, your post really brought a smile on my face. I don't know why, maybe it was the part about the babies, or the sad boat or the beauty of your predicting dream.

    Keep doing what you do.

  4. @Aaron: I remember you telling me about your ex-colleague. Such news are never good ones to hear.

    @Tom: I have cold blood type O Negative. I had purple toes today. I've always been cold regardless what the weather is. Ask Michael, he's my source of warmth. It's amazing how hot he is :P

    @Anouk: Hi there. Good to hear from you and glad that you enjoyed reading. Well, you know what I mean!