01 July 2009

Working with women: Lullaby of lies

Why aren't there men in the early childhood education industry in Singapore? Why aren't there guys who enjoy working with children? I looked at a wall of graduation pictures and I noticed that there used to be a male teacher at the childcare centre... the only one, and I was curious what it'd be like if he was still teaching there.

Where are the men in this industry, I wonder? Is it because of dignity, ego, and reputation that they worry about that chases them away from being good teachers of very young children? Or is it as intimidating for them the way it is for women to be construction workers working with machines?

Because I swear working with women is getting on my nerves. In the beginning it's so lovely, it gives off a warm familiar feeling, and instantly makes one feel taken care of, but what such sweet lullaby of lies.

My job as a receptionist at an engineering workshop filled with men who smelt of tar and diesel had earned me more respect as compared to other places I've worked where I have to interact with women all the time. So much drama behind those pretty faces (a.k.a. masks), wit and charm.

I'm not saying that working with men could be so much better, but drama-wise, it's a lot more peaceful compared to working with women. Men can be bitches too, but that's a different topic and I'm not going to debate that here. I'm saying that with men there may be more competition but there's less bitching. Two different things.

Anyway, I'm beginning to sense that hint of being bullied at work. But it's nothing new because I'm always prone to bullying anyway, I don't have to be at work to be bullied.

And it doesn't matter what kind of bullying it was or is, but bullying is bullying.
It's not serious, but it shouldn't be there in the first place.

Here's the difference:
Loser - Low self-esteem, no respect for others
Victim - Low self-esteem, respects others
Leader - High self-esteem, respects others
Bully - High self-esteem, no respect for others

But hating the bully is the wrong thing to do, because it's lack of emotional control and would thus lead me through even more bullying which beats the purpose of hating them in the first place.

And I'm not angry with them either because I know such behaviours are entirely immature and unnecessary and serves only egoic purposes. It just opens my eyes to how predictable people are.

They do very well hiding their true intentions.
"So serious. Can't you take a joke?", they'd say.
"You take things too seriously."
"There's really no sense of humour in you is there?" (Unlike some people, I don't find the need to boost my ego by bullying someone to have sense of humour.)
"You're being too sensitive." (Hm... so when I don't play your game you have absolutely nothing else to say. Why tell me your opinion? Can I spend it?)

Thus far the most I could do was not do much because whatever I do it's either unnecessary or not fast enough or wrong. But they have their ways to belittle me. Meanwhile I am watching. Up to this point they have decided that they know me.


1 comment:

  1. blah. working with women is annoying. so much backstabbing.
    but then, might just be cause my WHOLE work place is women