12 March 2008

Substitute Housewife

I get to be the substitute housewife.
At least when my mum's not around, whether she's off to work, or away on holiday somewhere. She's in Kuching (Sarawak) now with her parents and my youngest sister. I didn't hear from her until last afternoon and she told me that the flight turbulence was intense, and my sister freaked out. Generally she's not afraid of flying. I hope it wasn't so bad that she wouldn't get on the flight back home this Sunday.

Oh but wait, that would mean one less problem in the house. Hehe. Goody.

Hm. I don't want to complain about housework here. Generally it's okay with me (and Dessy I know you love doing housework, lol) but I have a problem with people not picking up after themselves.

I have a sister, right, the rebellious one - most of you know that. Last week she rummaged through the closet and threw all our clothes on the carpet so there was this huge pile of mess in the room. Clothes that were neatly folded all looked like dirty laundry. I could understand that she was looking for a particular thing to wear. But seriously... the whole damn closet?? She's mad.
So I told her, "Please arrange the clothes back into the closet nicely."
Her reply was, "Don't ask me. I don't know. It wasn't me."
And then I thought... Wow, it was her own clothes... but it wasn't her? (Huh...)

So today I gladly put all the clothes back where they are supposed to be coz she wouldn't do it. She would never do it. I felt like I just wanted to shove them all into a big black garbage bag that's supposed to go straight to the refinery.

Second scenario:
She got hungry.
The funny thing was that there was already food on the table, but she doesn't want it. She wanted to get something from the freezer, thaw it, fry it, eat it. That was it. So she took out the frying pan, and started to fry these mini puffs. I don't know what it's supposed to be called in English, but anyway, she left it frying forever. So what do you think happened?
Yes. Everything was blackened and burnt. So I said to her nicely again, "Please clean up afterwards."
And she said, "Later."
This 'later' may as well mean 'never'. I will master her language eventually.

So what she did was take out the burnt food, and that was that. She left everything right where they are - the pan, the ladle, plates, and of course the burnt stuff. All for me to clean! How kind of her. I don't understand what behaviour this is... this total lack of responsibility. The ignorance. The rudeness. The way she takes advantage of having a home. She only comes back to sleep, eat, shit, and make a mess for others to clean. And ladies and gentlemen, the person who does it is always me, not that I complain, but it's clearly out of her own negligence. Why should I wipe her ass and wash her plates almost 100% of the time when she's not a kid anymore? I don't even want to mention what sort of other things I've had to pick up after her... so do you get what I mean?
Why is she not the slightest bit embarrassed? Amazing.

She's not home right now... and it's past 4AM.
When she does get home, the house will smell of cigarette smoke... and then she taints everything all over again. Leaving her clothes lying around, taking stuff without asking, talking loudly on the phone, turning on the tv with the volume up loud, and after she wakes up she wouldn't even tidy up. This is how it is day after day after day.
I can't help her anymore. You can't make her do anything.

I can't be around all the time. And my mum can't be around all the time. I'm the only other person in the family who really is disciplined enough to keep the house tidy. Chances are she will carry this behaviour and attitude over into her adult life. But we can't keep cleaning up after her just so she can feel comfortable. I wish I could teach her a lesson but I don't even know what will give her a nasty surprise. I doubt it would work. I don't see any other choice, she's got to learn things the hard way.

I got so angry with her today after she slept through a storm and left her clothes hanging outside. I purposely didn't want to 'save' her clothes because I already woke her up before it rained and told her to take her clothes in otherwise it's gonna get wet. But no, she just went back to sleep.
I got so irritated that I took the clothes in myself. Then I saw her and she said "I forgot! I forgot!" Damn right she forgot. So I gave the clothes to her and said, "Hang them on the clothes rack in the kitchen."
She said, "Wait. Later."
I expected her to say that. It pissed me off all the time because I know she's not gonna do it. If she'd do it then I wouldn't have a problem with 'later'.
She just left the WET clothes on the living room carpet and went lying down on the sofa. Who in the world wouldn't go berserk at that? At that point I lost it.

I said, "What the hell!!"
And she argued, "I said I was going to do it later."
I said "No, you won't. You never do anything."
"I said later!"
"Now! What sense does it make to leave wet clothes on the carpet?"
"It's not even dripping!" (That was her excuse... clothes that have been lying in the rain for an hour is not wet and the carpet magically won't get wet either even if the clothes were lying there for the next 2 weeks).
"It has to be dripping to be wet?"
"What's your problem?"
"You will ruin the carpet!"
"It's not wet!"
"And you will never pick it up! And when I say that I bet my life on that fact, that is what's going to make you pick it up. So you know what? Why not you just realize the problematic fact that you will NEVER pick it up!"

After I said that at the top of my lungs she moved. And then she said, "Say whatever you want. As if it matters."
Like duh... I already know, sis.

I hate to raise my voice because I won't be nice at all. And it doesn't solve any problem either, it just makes things worse. I hope she'll just stop being so lazy. I can only hope. The fact is that we can't change anyone.
So I'll be glad. At least I'm not lazy.


  1. If you don't stop doing things for other people, they will not stop taking advantage of you. It's as simple as that. I know you will get the blame, but you don't need to accept it. You can just point at the person who is responsible. You've proved it now for enough years that you don't have an attitude problem, so let other people learn their lesson. Are they -not- supposed to grow up like you were forced to grow up?

  2. (I know whatever I say doesn't really matter to you, but I'll say it anyway)

    Niz needs to be sent to military school. I see no other way to change her besides that. Don't know if your parents will consider it as an option though.

    I don't know if this means anything or not, but for what it's worth, I know what it's like to have a sibling that is your complete opposite. Niz's case may be quite extreme, but I do feel for you.

    Love your new header btw. Photography is definitely your thing. Hope everything else is well.

  3. I agree..let her learnt life the harder way...then she will realise how she take you for granted..you should hv gone on a holiday yourself...hmmm..but well you will probably hope that she dun burnt down the whole house...
    one day she will understand..that u meant well for her..she will appreciate you eventually...
    be strong gurl... :)

  4. Thanks.. being nice gets you nowhere sometimes.